Thursday, April 3, 2008

OH forgot about the paintball game!

So there was this paintball game on saturday. It wasn't as fun as the normal paintball games because it wasn't just our little group of friends with our own rules and woodsball and just having fun. Nope. It was more like speedball which I hate, and we were against people who we didnt really know, and they kept turning their volosities up really high... Here is a shot I took to the arm AFTER I was already out... by the way... this was 20 feet away.

That turned into a very nice bleeding welt... Now it is almost gone and there are just a few cuts left. here is a close up. ya... that nice little redish pink ring... that is the blood and welt. that was fun... I know the guy who shot me too. He goes to Del Oro. The paintball game was Boots's senior project so a lot of people went to try and help him... but it wasn't as fun. and a lot of people got hurt. It was still fun... but not as fun. And then I attacked Ian, lol, apparently that face is his 'seducing face' I was dying laughing when I saw this.


Then when we left I was driving Chris, Ryan, and Alex and we all stopped at Carls Jr. that was fun! lol we were laughing and Ryan was getting all upset because they messed up the order and we were kinda teasing him and ya... it was just fun. :D

A little bit of everything...

So, there has been quite a bit going on! Winter Guard is becoming crazy and I'm kinda ready for it to be over, but only because of my instructor's sister Kim. She is driving me nuts!!! Terri lets us goof off a bit and we tease her and what not but if we do that with Kim... sorry, if I do that with Kim, she acts like she is going to bite my head off. Then there is the famous bruises. Mom hates the fact that I always have bruises and am pretty much always hurt in one way or another, but I'm not bothered by it. It's just like any other sport. You're going to get hurt and every sport has their down falls. I keep hitting my right hand really hard though and my thumb is really taking a beating. Sometimes it feels as if I have broken it. It's constantly hurting now. Other then that though it is fine and I still love performing! :D
Band is great. And one of the few things keeping me sane. Calvo was totally teasing me today. We listened to the recording of a professional band doing Escape From Platos Cave, which is the three part peice that we are doing in concert band, and the french horns were amazing! Given they are professionals AND they have EIGHT HORNS!!!! Compared to three. :S ya... big difference... but there is this part that I always kinda rush through because I'm trying to follow him and he totally stopped the band and said. "You have the whole band in the palm of your hand right now! Draw it out, make it smooth. You heard them on the recording. Take your time and make people think that your the queen of the band." Course during that last part he was kinda humming my part and I was cracking up laughing and turning red and everyone was laughing at him and I. He knows the potential I have and knows how well I play so he doesn't except anything less. I love that, but at the same time, it sucks sometimes.
I'm still confused about next year though... I don't know. Sometimes I really really want to stay and I get all excited about it... but other times... I just want to be done. Like right now. I don't want to be in highschool another year... I really dont. But then I think about marching band and all that stuff and it slowly pulls me back in. Either way I'm not going to be satisfied and I know that, but it really really sucks.
Work is... well... work. I'm getting sick of it. I have been sick of it for a while but now it's just like... meh... I don't wanna go... ever. I just had an interveiw with Chick-fil-a and I have been set up for a second interveiw with them. I'm not sure I want to work there, but I need another job and it's the only place that looks like it might hire me. Glug... I hate fast food. It's a nice fast food place... but it is still fast food. After Wendy's I had promised myself I would never work in fast food ever again. I didn't like it very much, but it looks like that is what i'm going to be stuck with for at least a couple months until I turn 18. Then hopefully I can get a job at a bank or something.
Home life. Well, I am back with my Mother. I live in the dining room area of our apartment and it gets kinda awkward and annoying sometimes. No privacy at all. But at the same time it is really nice to be back. I always loved living with my mom, she is SO EASY to live with and the apartment is nice asside from the guys who hit on me at the pool. There is a work out room that I can use, and the pool is kinda cold but nice and I can sun bathe which I found out that I actually like a lot. Not to mention there is this road next to the apartments that I can run down and it's about 2 miles all the way down and back. I ran the whole thing on Tuesday and then ran half a mile yesterday. I feel great and I feel skinner. I was starting to get that feeling of getting out of shape and getting... (for lack of a better and kinder word) well I was feeling kinda fat. There is only one problem. My right thigh is now hurting. To the touch even, and I don't know what to do. Mom says to let it rest and get off of it but I want to go running again today. which is really weird... I actually want to, but I probably shouldn't. I can't get off of it completely though because i have to work and I have winter guard and percussion. I don't know what to do.
The half mile that I ran yesterday was at my homeschool PE class up at Maidu. Two times ago when I went my half mile was 4 min 30 somethin secs, last time I got 4 min 2 secs, and then yesterday I got 3 min 44 secs!!! I was flabbergausted!!! hehe I love that word. I felt like I was running the same pace that I always do and I was out of breath the same amount, but I was shocked when I heard him say the 3 min. I beat it by almost 20 seconds and that is a lot in running! If I could keep that pace up you know how fast my mile time would be?!?!?! That would be insane!!! AND I was the first girl to come it. That has never happened to me! Also I almost beat one of the boys. OK ok ok... given the fact that most of the girls there dont want to run anyway and the guy I almost beat didn't have shoes on but come on! It made me feel really good. I passed the guy at one point and I don't think he wanted me to beat him because he started running again... He got 3 min 43 secs. HE BEAT ME BY A STUPID SECOND! GIR!!!! lol oh well.
Okay so the last thing I'm going to talk about is Junior Prom and My relationship with Chris. I'm really nervous about Junior Prom. My dress still doesn't fit completely right and it's this weekend. I'm also really worried that Chris will like it or not. I know I know stupid thing to worry about but I am! I have never worn a dress like this before and true I feel beautiful in it... but ... I don't know... I'm just really nervous... Him and I are doing great! I was at his house yesterday and he is totally sweet. A couple weeks ago he kissed me on the forehead and I got kinda giddy because I dont know why but I love it when he does that. It makes me feel special for some odd unknown reason and he wouldn't stop tickling me until I told him that. Well yesterday I was feeling kinda crummy and he just wrapped his arms around me and kissed my forehead and just held me. This sounds really girly and retarded and like its from a movie but seriously when he did that I temporarely forgot about the crumminess. I just felt happy, warm, and safe. Then there was the part when he used tickling to get me to kiss him that was funny. I was laughing like crazy and he wouldn't stop tickling me and he said, "there is just a simple thing that you have to do and I'll stop." That was funny too. Some people think that when Chris is tickling me or we are goofing off or something that he is just using me as a source of entertainment, but you know what? I really could care less. It's fun being able to goof off and be myself around someone. I can't do that around a lot of people. And it sounds crazy but I actually like being tickled by him and having our little poking/pinching fights, and all the other play stuff we do. It's just fun. And aren't you suppose to be able to have fun with the person your dating, love, and married to? (if you are married anyway, no Chris and I are not married, I'm not even 18 yet.) He is my best friend... weather he knows that or not, he is. Cameron is close, she is great, but she will never be the same as him.
I wish my family could see how happy I am when I'm around or talking to him... Yes he hurt me... and he hurt me worse then anyone else ever has... but he is trying and I am trying. We don't want it to end the way it did last time. Yes I'm scared, but that's okay. Please, just try to be happy for me... and stop saying the things you do. It really does bother me, weather I show it or not. I know your just trying to look out for me and love me and what not... but it hurts... I love you all.